with A.Z. Araujo - Episode 13:

Influences

with A.Z. Araujo - Episode 13:

Influences

CUSTOM JAVASCRIPT / HTML
There are times when we read something, or see an image; maybe it is as simple as a conversation with someone. It affects us at a deeper level then we realize, and we let it rob us of our power in that space. Who you surround yourself with will determine the level you are playing and performing at. Identify those individuals in your life that are draining you of your positivity and create distance from them; seek out those that feed your positive energy and let them influence your outlook. Hitting the ceiling in your business and relationships doesn't mean you lack in your skill set; it means you need to look at the people who are determining your mindset.
Influences
  • ​Today's topic is a simple one that I have learned so many lessons from. The influences you allow in your life; who you have in your ear matters. This past weekend my family was excited for what we had planned for Easter, one of those plans is to go to church; to give our respect and love for the sacrifices that Jesus made to forgive us. I always look forward to the powerful message the pastor has and the message is always on point.
  • ​Before church, I was reading the news on my, and I read something that took me to a sad, debilitating place. I heard the news about what happened 10,000 miles away in Sri Lanka; over 200 individuals died on Easter morning. It was carried out by a group of individuals that didn't agree with a different group of individuals.
  • ​It saddened me, and I also found some pictures of the event that were pretty gruesome, images of blood on the walls. I read about children and every group that was affected by the attack. It gave me a little bit of anxiety and touched me in a way I wasn't expecting. I got ready for church, and I didn't think about it in the form of how it would affect me for the rest of my day. 
  • ​When we are in a situation where something impacts us like that, in a fearful manner, it increases our anxiety. Whether it's a conversation with your family or a passive-aggressive conversation with family and friends. We don't think about how it will affect us later. 
  • ​When we got to church we sat in the back; the church was packed. I don't remember what the Pastor said that day. I know it was powerful and from time to time, I would feel the energy and get goosebumps; my head was somewhere else, and I couldn't be present. 
  • ​All I was thinking about was terrorists coming through the church and shooting the church up. That's all I could think about, even being aware of all of the exits in our vicinity. I was thinking about how I would sacrifice myself and cover my daughters and my wife if someone were to come through. Fear and anxiety were penetrating my mind with all of these thoughts. 
  • ​Anytime anybody would get up I would stare at them and wonder what they were doing. It all rooted in what I was reading. That's all I was thinking about.
Misery Loves Company
  • I have been in that situation before; being around negativity all of my life no wonder I couldn't succeed or find happiness. Because I was always thinking about the negativity, fear and passive-aggressive nature of family and friends, you can't operate in power or be present if you are constantly in that space. I couldn't concentrate that day; I was in fear for my life. There wasn't any indication that anything was going down, but because I allowed my mind to be overwhelmed by these thoughts it created chaos. 
  • ​Consider this if you have year after year of disappointments, don't pay attention to your performance but the environments you are putting yourself in. The people you are allowing in your head, often it is family, and that is unfortunate. It's not your ability to create a life that works, to strive to have it all and to have a thriving profitable business; it's that we are always caught up in the thoughts and comments of others.
  • ​I read something and never considered what that when in conversation people are trying to make other people feel how they are feeling. Whenever you have a conversation with someone, they are trying to make you feel the same way they are feeling. They are frustrated; what do you think their end game is? To make you feel what they are feeling. Not maliciously, or maybe they are, but we need to be aware. Jealousy, anger, upset or miserable; people are trying to make you feel the same way they are feeling. 
  • ​At the same time, there are others that are trying; they are always happy. They have a positive spin to every situation and want to lift your spirits. I am inviting you to invite those individuals more into your life and identify those that are continually trying to make you feel miserable and afraid, angry and frustrated. They are all around, and if you can't get what you want from your business, you have a lot of them, and you have allowed them to penetrate your mind. 
  • ​When I created distance from negative relationships, or not on the same path as mine; my life and finances flourished because I didn't allow those thoughts to overwhelm me anymore. I identified them and said I love you, but I have to distance from you. Some of you are receiving that from your spouse which is unfortunate. 
  • ​It is your job not to fall into that trap but to lead a greater mindset for both of you. We have all been in that situation. Passive aggressiveness that makes you shut down. You get invited to a family function, you think it will be fun, and your spouse says something like if he or she has the time they are always working. How are you supposed to respond to something like that? It's passive-aggressive behavior. Is it about you or the other person's frustrations with themselves? They haven't reached a place in life where they love what they do, but you need to stand powerful against the thoughts of negativity.
  • ​They will eventually rise to your level; I used to do that to Carla as well. I would encourage her to a certain point and then she was doing more than I was and I would say something to offset her trajectory. Why? Because I felt less than. Most won't admit it, but I am saying it.
If I’m Down; You're Down
  • I can remember a time when Carla was preparing for a show, and she was in tip-top shape. I would go to the gym with her all the time, but this time I wasn't feeling good about myself. I am reflecting and identifying it now. It was my mission to throw her off of her path; I didn't see it as that way, but I was feeling frustrated with myself. 
  • ​She was working out and doing a pull-down bar, and there aren't many ways you can do that exercise incorrectly, but I found a way. I told her she was doing it wrong. She was focused, and I couldn't find my focus, so I attacked and blamed. I wanted others to feel like I was feeling. I told her to let me show you how you are doing it and mocked the way she did it. During that time and Carla was still taking a lot of my shit and I shut her down. She said she didn't feel like working out and anymore and wanted to leave. I felt terrible, but I did what I set out to do; it didn't feel good. 
  • ​People will always make you feel like they feel, how they think is the objective. Through conversation or passive aggressiveness, they are trying to penetrate your mind. The same way the news was overwhelming me and made me so anxious, I couldn't be present. If you are struggling with your business, it's not your skill set; identify those people who always have problems in their lives who are constantly telling you how frustrated and unhappy they are. You will not outgrow someone who surrounds themselves with positivity. 
  • ​If you are continually hitting the ceiling you can't break through, its the people that are around you. Identify them, create space, because you are more than capable of succeeding at a high level in this life. If you are constantly running into problems with trying to lose weight, living a healthy lifestyle, it's the people around you. If you hang out with me 24/7 your behaviors will change, your mindset will change, and fulfillment will be part of your life.
  • ​I can't be there all of the time. So you need to identify more and more people with that same mindset. You are no savior, so create the space or be content with what you have today. Stop being so hard on yourself for not achieving what you want or create that space and go after what you want. The environment is so vital to your success. 
  • ​At A.Z. & Associates it becomes your normal. The way we talk and how we are so raw about what we discuss. It's normal in this environment but it all changes when you are plucked away from here and put somewhere else. A lot of people don't discover that until they are out. We all need that positive reinforcement and those people because the vast majority of the population is negative.
  • ​Having a false sense of accomplishment and our ego overrun our thoughts is the first step to retracting to your lowest form of habit. I saw that first hand when I had an agent come up to me and say, I had another agent that left, and they are trying to recruit me. They are telling me how great this other company is; I said to him, that was awesome and let's look at some numbers. The motto at A.Z. & Associates is “No I don't have it all figured out, but somehow I always figure it out.”
If I’m Down; You're Down
  • We will always retract to our lowest form of habit when the wrong people are in our minds. I do, and that is why I continue to invest in the coaches and consultants that will guide me forward and allow me to see something more significant for myself. I know what I am capable of when I am not on my game; the discussion and chaos I can create when I am not on the path.
  • ​When you are gone from an environment that breathes and lives positivity, where we encourage a have it all lifestyle, we encourage you to keep going and remind you to take a stand for yourself and impact others; it is priceless, but we could put a number on it if we were to look. This individual who left our company went from making 8.2 million to 5.4 million. It's only been four months. Before that, it was all growth. 
  • ​I am not saying this environment creates wishes, but it reinforces behavior because of the negativity that most of society is in. You don't get more confident; you become more scarce. I’m not a guru; this environment isn't magical; it's just real. We can have those real conversations when the darkness sets in and not avoid it and pretend that everything is okay. 
  • ​Positivity will make you, and the environment will get you there faster. This morning I went out to the track with Carla. We met a couple of dental school students that were in their late 20’s. We started talking because I saw them running before outside of the field before it opened. I asked them why they were running and what they were doing. They said they were going to run a few miles. I asked them what their mile average was and they said it was usually around 6.
  • I was thinking, holy cow, I just wanted to come in here and do under 8. I told them I was going to run with them and asked if they minded. I wasn't scared of their success; I wanted to be in an environment where there were people that are doing it at a higher level. They took the lead right away, but I didn't let them get away from me; I was about 20 yards behind them for the 1st mile. The first mile I did 6:57 and then I did 7:05 and ended with 7:14 for the 3rd mile. I had an average of 7:06 which was my best 3-mile run. Because I was in the right environment, it pulled me. I didn't say oh I am 40 years old, and they have 15 years on me; I will continue to play at 8-minute miles. 
  • That environment encouraged me because an environment influences the way you think, believe and live. It pushed me, and I feel really good right now, I feel accomplished. If they weren't there, I can't tell you that I would have pushed that hard. This environment makes you push harder, not to be content with your marketing but to continue to build on it. 
  • No one does it better because we are striving for more. No other brokerage has more podcasts than us, because we dare to keep moving. Identify those people who are trying to make you feel like they are feeling. Maybe they are frustrated, less than, jealous, angry, pissed off at the world; create space, allow them to go and give them distance.
  • Then identify those that are happy, excited, positive, committed, healthy and loving. Bring those people closer to you and give them a nice big hug. The thoughts that we allow in our minds will influence the productivity we have as parents, spouses, and business people; let's get after it. You know exactly what to do.
  • I didn't realize how these thoughts can overwhelm us; I was genuinely scared in the church that is supposed to be a safe environment. The thoughts that were going through my mind are unbelievable. These are the same thoughts that we allow to be fed by the wrong people we allow in our lives. 
  • Sometimes situations can be very debilitating only to make things worse as we shut down and create distance from our family because we are so caught up in our thoughts; our marriage, our eating habits, our mindset is going in the wrong direction, and it's a decision just to keep going, and it can hurt. 
  • There are greater ramifications when we shut down, and there is no revenue coming in. You become so disconnected we create that fear within in our kids of how are mom and dad doing? They don't need that; they don't need to see that. They need to see strength, perseverance, that is what they need to see. 
  • I hope you have been impacted by the lessons I learned this weekend. Let's identify the people we allow in our lives and going after what we want to be fulfilled and living a have it all lifestyle to the core. Subscribe rate and review this podcast and you can share it with your families also. I think it is essential for everyone to hear; share it with the ones you love.

More Episodes

CUSTOM JAVASCRIPT / HTML
There are times when we read something, or see an image; maybe it is as simple as a conversation with someone. It affects us at a deeper level then we realize, and we let it rob us of our power in that space. Who you surround yourself with will determine the level you are playing and performing at. Identify those individuals in your life that are draining you of your positivity and create distance from them; seek out those that feed your positive energy and let them influence your outlook. Hitting the ceiling in your business and relationships doesn't mean you lack in your skill set; it means you need to look at the people who are determining your mindset.
Influences
  • ​Today's topic is a simple one that I have learned so many lessons from. The influences you allow in your life; who you have in your ear matters. This past weekend my family was excited for what we had planned for Easter, one of those plans is to go to church; to give our respect and love for the sacrifices that Jesus made to forgive us. I always look forward to the powerful message the pastor has and the message is always on point.
  • ​Before church, I was reading the news on my, and I read something that took me to a sad, debilitating place. I heard the news about what happened 10,000 miles away in Sri Lanka; over 200 individuals died on Easter morning. It was carried out by a group of individuals that didn't agree with a different group of individuals.
  • ​It saddened me, and I also found some pictures of the event that were pretty gruesome, images of blood on the walls. I read about children and every group that was affected by the attack. It gave me a little bit of anxiety and touched me in a way I wasn't expecting. I got ready for church, and I didn't think about it in the form of how it would affect me for the rest of my day. 
  • ​When we are in a situation where something impacts us like that, in a fearful manner, it increases our anxiety. Whether it's a conversation with your family or a passive-aggressive conversation with family and friends. We don't think about how it will affect us later. 
  • ​When we got to church we sat in the back; the church was packed. I don't remember what the Pastor said that day. I know it was powerful and from time to time, I would feel the energy and get goosebumps; my head was somewhere else, and I couldn't be present. 
  • ​All I was thinking about was terrorists coming through the church and shooting the church up. That's all I could think about, even being aware of all of the exits in our vicinity. I was thinking about how I would sacrifice myself and cover my daughters and my wife if someone were to come through. Fear and anxiety were penetrating my mind with all of these thoughts. 
  • ​Anytime anybody would get up I would stare at them and wonder what they were doing. It all rooted in what I was reading. That's all I was thinking about.
Misery Loves Company
  • I have been in that situation before; being around negativity all of my life no wonder I couldn't succeed or find happiness. Because I was always thinking about the negativity, fear and passive-aggressive nature of family and friends, you can't operate in power or be present if you are constantly in that space. I couldn't concentrate that day; I was in fear for my life. There wasn't any indication that anything was going down, but because I allowed my mind to be overwhelmed by these thoughts it created chaos. 
  • ​Consider this if you have year after year of disappointments, don't pay attention to your performance but the environments you are putting yourself in. The people you are allowing in your head, often it is family, and that is unfortunate. It's not your ability to create a life that works, to strive to have it all and to have a thriving profitable business; it's that we are always caught up in the thoughts and comments of others.
  • ​I read something and never considered what that when in conversation people are trying to make other people feel how they are feeling. Whenever you have a conversation with someone, they are trying to make you feel the same way they are feeling. They are frustrated; what do you think their end game is? To make you feel what they are feeling. Not maliciously, or maybe they are, but we need to be aware. Jealousy, anger, upset or miserable; people are trying to make you feel the same way they are feeling. 
  • ​At the same time, there are others that are trying; they are always happy. They have a positive spin to every situation and want to lift your spirits. I am inviting you to invite those individuals more into your life and identify those that are continually trying to make you feel miserable and afraid, angry and frustrated. They are all around, and if you can't get what you want from your business, you have a lot of them, and you have allowed them to penetrate your mind. 
  • ​When I created distance from negative relationships, or not on the same path as mine; my life and finances flourished because I didn't allow those thoughts to overwhelm me anymore. I identified them and said I love you, but I have to distance from you. Some of you are receiving that from your spouse which is unfortunate. 
  • ​It is your job not to fall into that trap but to lead a greater mindset for both of you. We have all been in that situation. Passive aggressiveness that makes you shut down. You get invited to a family function, you think it will be fun, and your spouse says something like if he or she has the time they are always working. How are you supposed to respond to something like that? It's passive-aggressive behavior. Is it about you or the other person's frustrations with themselves? They haven't reached a place in life where they love what they do, but you need to stand powerful against the thoughts of negativity.
  • ​They will eventually rise to your level; I used to do that to Carla as well. I would encourage her to a certain point and then she was doing more than I was and I would say something to offset her trajectory. Why? Because I felt less than. Most won't admit it, but I am saying it.
If I’m Down; You're Down
  • I can remember a time when Carla was preparing for a show, and she was in tip-top shape. I would go to the gym with her all the time, but this time I wasn't feeling good about myself. I am reflecting and identifying it now. It was my mission to throw her off of her path; I didn't see it as that way, but I was feeling frustrated with myself. 
  • ​She was working out and doing a pull-down bar, and there aren't many ways you can do that exercise incorrectly, but I found a way. I told her she was doing it wrong. She was focused, and I couldn't find my focus, so I attacked and blamed. I wanted others to feel like I was feeling. I told her to let me show you how you are doing it and mocked the way she did it. During that time and Carla was still taking a lot of my shit and I shut her down. She said she didn't feel like working out and anymore and wanted to leave. I felt terrible, but I did what I set out to do; it didn't feel good. 
  • ​People will always make you feel like they feel, how they think is the objective. Through conversation or passive aggressiveness, they are trying to penetrate your mind. The same way the news was overwhelming me and made me so anxious, I couldn't be present. If you are struggling with your business, it's not your skill set; identify those people who always have problems in their lives who are constantly telling you how frustrated and unhappy they are. You will not outgrow someone who surrounds themselves with positivity. 
  • ​If you are continually hitting the ceiling you can't break through, its the people that are around you. Identify them, create space, because you are more than capable of succeeding at a high level in this life. If you are constantly running into problems with trying to lose weight, living a healthy lifestyle, it's the people around you. If you hang out with me 24/7 your behaviors will change, your mindset will change, and fulfillment will be part of your life.
  • ​I can't be there all of the time. So you need to identify more and more people with that same mindset. You are no savior, so create the space or be content with what you have today. Stop being so hard on yourself for not achieving what you want or create that space and go after what you want. The environment is so vital to your success. 
  • ​At A.Z. & Associates it becomes your normal. The way we talk and how we are so raw about what we discuss. It's normal in this environment but it all changes when you are plucked away from here and put somewhere else. A lot of people don't discover that until they are out. We all need that positive reinforcement and those people because the vast majority of the population is negative.
  • ​Having a false sense of accomplishment and our ego overrun our thoughts is the first step to retracting to your lowest form of habit. I saw that first hand when I had an agent come up to me and say, I had another agent that left, and they are trying to recruit me. They are telling me how great this other company is; I said to him, that was awesome and let's look at some numbers. The motto at A.Z. & Associates is “No I don't have it all figured out, but somehow I always figure it out.”
If I’m Down; You're Down
  • We will always retract to our lowest form of habit when the wrong people are in our minds. I do, and that is why I continue to invest in the coaches and consultants that will guide me forward and allow me to see something more significant for myself. I know what I am capable of when I am not on my game; the discussion and chaos I can create when I am not on the path.
  • ​When you are gone from an environment that breathes and lives positivity, where we encourage a have it all lifestyle, we encourage you to keep going and remind you to take a stand for yourself and impact others; it is priceless, but we could put a number on it if we were to look. This individual who left our company went from making 8.2 million to 5.4 million. It's only been four months. Before that, it was all growth. 
  • ​I am not saying this environment creates wishes, but it reinforces behavior because of the negativity that most of society is in. You don't get more confident; you become more scarce. I’m not a guru; this environment isn't magical; it's just real. We can have those real conversations when the darkness sets in and not avoid it and pretend that everything is okay. 
  • ​Positivity will make you, and the environment will get you there faster. This morning I went out to the track with Carla. We met a couple of dental school students that were in their late 20’s. We started talking because I saw them running before outside of the field before it opened. I asked them why they were running and what they were doing. They said they were going to run a few miles. I asked them what their mile average was and they said it was usually around 6.
  • I was thinking, holy cow, I just wanted to come in here and do under 8. I told them I was going to run with them and asked if they minded. I wasn't scared of their success; I wanted to be in an environment where there were people that are doing it at a higher level. They took the lead right away, but I didn't let them get away from me; I was about 20 yards behind them for the 1st mile. The first mile I did 6:57 and then I did 7:05 and ended with 7:14 for the 3rd mile. I had an average of 7:06 which was my best 3-mile run. Because I was in the right environment, it pulled me. I didn't say oh I am 40 years old, and they have 15 years on me; I will continue to play at 8-minute miles. 
  • That environment encouraged me because an environment influences the way you think, believe and live. It pushed me, and I feel really good right now, I feel accomplished. If they weren't there, I can't tell you that I would have pushed that hard. This environment makes you push harder, not to be content with your marketing but to continue to build on it. 
  • No one does it better because we are striving for more. No other brokerage has more podcasts than us, because we dare to keep moving. Identify those people who are trying to make you feel like they are feeling. Maybe they are frustrated, less than, jealous, angry, pissed off at the world; create space, allow them to go and give them distance.
  • Then identify those that are happy, excited, positive, committed, healthy and loving. Bring those people closer to you and give them a nice big hug. The thoughts that we allow in our minds will influence the productivity we have as parents, spouses, and business people; let's get after it. You know exactly what to do.
  • I didn't realize how these thoughts can overwhelm us; I was genuinely scared in the church that is supposed to be a safe environment. The thoughts that were going through my mind are unbelievable. These are the same thoughts that we allow to be fed by the wrong people we allow in our lives. 
  • Sometimes situations can be very debilitating only to make things worse as we shut down and create distance from our family because we are so caught up in our thoughts; our marriage, our eating habits, our mindset is going in the wrong direction, and it's a decision just to keep going, and it can hurt. 
  • There are greater ramifications when we shut down, and there is no revenue coming in. You become so disconnected we create that fear within in our kids of how are mom and dad doing? They don't need that; they don't need to see that. They need to see strength, perseverance, that is what they need to see. 
  • I hope you have been impacted by the lessons I learned this weekend. Let's identify the people we allow in our lives and going after what we want to be fulfilled and living a have it all lifestyle to the core. Subscribe rate and review this podcast and you can share it with your families also. I think it is essential for everyone to hear; share it with the ones you love.

More Episodes



A.Z. & Associates Real Estate Group - 2019