CUSTOM JAVASCRIPT / HTML
It's easy to become complacent and mediocre and not do the difficult things because everything is easy in life. Many times this is where most people get stuck; the inactions will pay its consequences. Being intentional, taking on the suffering voluntarily, will empower you, and propel you forward in the trajectory of your life. Waiting for the suffering to sneak up on you involuntarily will leave you unprepared, powerless, and stagnate. Choose the suffering, and watch your life change in every facet, realizing exponential growth and success.
The Cost of Suffering
- Today's topic is “Why We Must Suffer.” So many great lessons for me over the past week and I am grateful for the choices I've made and where my life is leading, the things I can accomplish. It reinforces the fact our life can become what we pour into it. It isn't an involuntary set of circumstances or suffering. It's what we choose to do and when we are intentional about our daily actions to obtain the life we want.
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It's easy to become complacent and mediocre and not do the difficult things because everything is easy in life. Last week I had the honor of unveiling our new headquarters for AZ & Associates and Do the Work. It's ten years to the date we will be opening the new headquarters after we decided to branch off on our own. When you do the right things, over time, you will get the results you seek. To unveil it and get the response we did, was amazing and fulfilled me in ways that fired me up and made me appreciate the suffering we went through. The financial devastation and not knowing where our next dollar was coming from—the suffering of lawsuits and being audited, not understanding how we would get out of it.
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The key to our suffering is realizing we have to continue to move forward; take the next step, and see the lessons in everything. There is involuntary suffering and voluntary suffering. When we are not intentional or focused on the actions of our life, business, family, and how we treat our body, there will be involuntary suffering, which is another word for a consequence—the consequences of inaction, mediocrity, and complacency. Involuntary suffering can be very devastating because it leads us to a point where it can be challenging to get out.
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I did a lot of involuntary suffering, but I chose not to allow it to hinder me or be the story of my life. Many times this is where most people get stuck; the inactions will pay its consequences. You will suffer the consequences. When you realize you can change those consequences, you will decide the overall satisfaction in your life. Although there were times when I went and did the wrong things, I learned when I was in that dark place and to change the trajectory of my life. I didn't allow it to be my story. Some of you are suffering because of the involuntary things you chose not to do—the unintentional actions, not being open or honest in your relationships.
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Your business and marriage might be suffering. There is a way to change that trajectory because with all suffering comes lessons, and some are harder to get lessons from. Voluntarily suffering allows you to choose the pain, do things when most won't, and overcome—learning greater from those than the involuntary ones. In both sufferings, there are ways for you to change the trajectory of your life.
Don't Drink the {pool} Water
- Completing the Ironman 70.3 was voluntarily choosing the pain, realizing I can get better. With this, I will build the capacity for all the things in my life. My first Triathlon was a Spring Triathlon, and it was done in a pool. Not even in open water. This was four years ago. I started the run, which is probably ⅛ of what I completed this past weekend; I was suffering the entire run and the cycling. I was making decisions causing me to suffer further later on. This is the story where I drank pool water because I thought my cramps would go away. I was delusional.
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I got so sick after that, and I didn't prepare at all for the Triathlon as I should have. I didn't hire a coach or practice; to do what was necessary to finish strong. None of that was in my vocabulary. I merely chose to do it. I thought everything I did prior prepared me to take it on. I was wrong, and suffering through the process, making decisions that only made things worse could have caused me to stop there. I could have said this was the end of it. Swimming, cycling, and running will not be part of what I do. That would have been the jest of my Triathlon career.
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I realized I didn't want my story to end like that, and it doesn't align with what I have accomplished in life. Why would I give up so quickly, and four months later, I entered another. I didn't learn all of my lessons or prepare as I needed to, but I did prepare a little more. I found myself suffering in that place again. I was scared for my life, and I thought I was going to drown in open water. I suffered throughout the swim, in my cycling, and running. Again that could have been the end of my story; I wasn't meant for this. I could have carried that around; it was something I tried, but it wasn't something I was supposed to do in my life. I will stick to weights.
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I kept showing up because it didn't align with who I am. Some of us hold on to stories that we tried something, and it brought so much pain, now you avoid it. You did one video on social media, and someone shot you down; you remember the pain, and now you avoid it. You went to a Listing Appointment, and you were unprepared and embarrassed, now you avoid it. Anytime you are faced with a challenging contract, it's too much for you, so you avoid getting more. You can only handle one or two a month, and it is too overwhelming, too stressful, too painful. You are sticking to the story because you are unable and unwilling to suffer anymore. There are great lessons in every moment of suffering, whether it is voluntary or involuntary.
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You will get more power and purpose when you voluntarily step into these things. Continuing to make your videos voluntarily, knowing you will suffer more consequences of people speaking against you, of contradiction, and embarrassment. The consequences of not doing anything will lead to the things you don't want, but we are holding on to the story. I also held onto the story of me not being a triathlete; it's too much.
From Suffering Comes Inspiration
No Shame in the Suffering Game
- If you are in a place where you don't see that growth or inspiration or fire, you choose not to suffer. You will suffer the consequences of that. It's very different, the voluntary vs. the involuntary. It's all good, and you will hear it all through society, making fun of your COVID weight, like it's a joke. They will end up suffering the consequences. Just all of the 1,000’s of athletes that decided to take this on voluntarily decided to suffer when everyone else shut down. There will be a vast disparity between the lives who chose not to vs. those that did. You must decide which side you will be on. You can make light of the situation and joke about it, and it's all good until one day it isn't.
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You can look at a person next to you who decided to do all of the right things, double down on their business, and not get shut down by the opinions of others, and market like no other; you will notice the vast disparity, feeling the shame of not keeping up and shutting down. You had every opportunity to stay up, keep up, and keep going. Will you choose the voluntary suffering, what it takes to be embarrassed, get those opinions from others, and continue to move? Or, will you subside? One way or another, you will feel the suffering.
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There is an excellent quote by Tim Farris, “ The more voluntary suffering you build into your life, the less involuntary suffering will affect your life.” It's a decision. What will you choose? I have learned to choose the pains, undergo, and feel the distress. I've learned to endure the pain willingly. I think we all have the same story but tend to forget how great we are because voluntary suffering allows you to operate with power and authority in all aspects of your life. When you don't take charge of your suffering, it will take charge of you. It comes with an intention for voluntary suffering, and we endure it willingly, knowing there is something greater on the other side.
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What are you afraid to suffer from? The embarrassment, shame, distress? What are you avoiding? Will that be the story of your life? I could only handle one closing or two; once I close two transactions per month, it is too much for my family and too hard on me. If that is the case, then be happy with that. Wanting anything else beyond that will be involuntary suffering. Knowing you want something more significant but unwilling to do it.
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Romans 5:3 says, “We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame.” It gives us confidence, capacity, certainty, and will. There is no shame in that.
In Closing
- I had the honor of being on this journey with eight other agents of AZ & Associates. It was a complete honor for me. They decided to take on voluntary suffering as well. They also decided to take on 20 weeks of hard labor, shattering the stories of who they were and who they are. Realizing they have so much more within them. I'm honored to have finished this, and every one of them finished and thanked me for taking them on this journey of suffering. It was utterly amazing. I got texts that they were honored to suffer along with me. Every one of them is now stronger, more powerful, more specific in all aspects of their lives. They voluntarily chose this. You will see how this will affect every aspect of their lives. Each one of them is more certain of where their life is going, where their relationships are, how to become better fathers; every one of them has taken this energy into their business. They are on an upward slope of what it takes to win life, in the game of life.
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To sit back today, looking back at what we embarked on, it is nothing short of great. I know they are thinking the same thing. They have more within them and more to prove. We will take on the next challenge, and all of us will come out stronger, wiser, and more powerful than before. We decided to choose our pain, to suffer, and not sit back and allow it and life to choose it for us. My question and challenge are what you can choose to bring into your life? Maybe this is the day you take a stand and declare you don't care what others have to say about my marketing. I don't care what people say about my videos. I will do this for me, and I will get better. I will communicate more powerfully because everything requires the reps, and I will look back one day and appreciate the person I am today and the courage to move forward.
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I look at my videos from 2014, and I am stuttering the entire time. I can't even look into the camera. I appreciate that person who dared to endure the suffering and the stories he had for himself about not being a good communicator, not good on video, not good on marketing. I have shattered every one of those things. I am elite, I am the best, and I continue to remind myself of that. Whatever story you have, refuse to hang on to it; there is more within you.
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I'm so proud of what we have accomplished, and it is the domino effect of doing the right things. I'm looking forward to the new headquarters and my next challenge. That is the key to life, to challenge ourselves, so we have something to look forward to. What is it you want for your business, family, and yourself? How do you want to feel? Set those targets, and stop living how everyone else is living, complacent. It's all good until one day it's not.
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Set a short term goal, a short term target, and go after hard, hitting it. This is the communication of all the right things over time. I'm giving you the key and formula that has worked for me, and it works. You have to choose the pain of growth. Get through this because you are made of more. You can choose the story of this is not me, or I will make it for me. I will become that person, which means you have to suffer through the learning process, the learning curve. And you are getting it done. I'm only one week removed from turning 42, and I am elated to think about where I will be at 52. It's the beginning of the journey.
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I feel good. I feel elated. It's incredible what your body does when you allow it to recover, less than 24 hours removed from the competition, and I am feeling 100 times better. I'm looking forward to the next challenge. I hope you all come along for the journey. Thank you again for joining me for this episode of Mindset Mastery; you know exactly what to do, and I will talk to you soon.
More Episodes
CUSTOM JAVASCRIPT / HTML
It's easy to become complacent and mediocre and not do the difficult things because everything is easy in life. Many times this is where most people get stuck; the inactions will pay its consequences. Being intentional, taking on the suffering voluntarily, will empower you, and propel you forward in the trajectory of your life. Waiting for the suffering to sneak up on you involuntarily will leave you unprepared, powerless, and stagnate. Choose the suffering, and watch your life change in every facet, realizing exponential growth and success.
The Cost of Suffering
Don't Drink the {pool} Water
- Completing the Ironman 70.3 was voluntarily choosing the pain, realizing I can get better. With this, I will build the capacity for all the things in my life. My first Triathlon was a Spring Triathlon, and it was done in a pool. Not even in open water. This was four years ago. I started the run, which is probably ⅛ of what I completed this past weekend; I was suffering the entire run and the cycling. I was making decisions causing me to suffer further later on. This is the story where I drank pool water because I thought my cramps would go away. I was delusional.
-
I got so sick after that, and I didn't prepare at all for the Triathlon as I should have. I didn't hire a coach or practice; to do what was necessary to finish strong. None of that was in my vocabulary. I merely chose to do it. I thought everything I did prior prepared me to take it on. I was wrong, and suffering through the process, making decisions that only made things worse could have caused me to stop there. I could have said this was the end of it. Swimming, cycling, and running will not be part of what I do. That would have been the jest of my Triathlon career.
-
I realized I didn't want my story to end like that, and it doesn't align with what I have accomplished in life. Why would I give up so quickly, and four months later, I entered another. I didn't learn all of my lessons or prepare as I needed to, but I did prepare a little more. I found myself suffering in that place again. I was scared for my life, and I thought I was going to drown in open water. I suffered throughout the swim, in my cycling, and running. Again that could have been the end of my story; I wasn't meant for this. I could have carried that around; it was something I tried, but it wasn't something I was supposed to do in my life. I will stick to weights.
-
I kept showing up because it didn't align with who I am. Some of us hold on to stories that we tried something, and it brought so much pain, now you avoid it. You did one video on social media, and someone shot you down; you remember the pain, and now you avoid it. You went to a Listing Appointment, and you were unprepared and embarrassed, now you avoid it. Anytime you are faced with a challenging contract, it's too much for you, so you avoid getting more. You can only handle one or two a month, and it is too overwhelming, too stressful, too painful. You are sticking to the story because you are unable and unwilling to suffer anymore. There are great lessons in every moment of suffering, whether it is voluntary or involuntary.
-
You will get more power and purpose when you voluntarily step into these things. Continuing to make your videos voluntarily, knowing you will suffer more consequences of people speaking against you, of contradiction, and embarrassment. The consequences of not doing anything will lead to the things you don't want, but we are holding on to the story. I also held onto the story of me not being a triathlete; it's too much.
From Suffering Comes Inspiration
- This weekend I did my Ironman 70.3. I prepared and took many lessons from the previous years. I knew the suffering I was facing if I didn't properly prepare, hire the right coaches, and train for weeks. I didn't want to suffer from the course and voluntarily chose to suffer 20 weeks before the event. Three hours a day, six days a week, I decided to take on the suffering ahead of time and properly prepare. I knew that involuntary suffering was not where I wanted to be. I would not feel as powerful as I do today, but I decided to keep moving forward, and the suffering is teaching me the lessons I need. I chose not to allow that to be the end of it.
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Just as I didn't allow the financial devastation to be the end of it and hold on to the story, there are people to this day holding on to those stories. They are too afraid to move forward and grow because they may face those issues again, not knowing they have built a capacity to move forward. I have built the capacity to keep going. They held onto the story, and I had done the same, I would never have been able to do the unveiling we did last week. We will be doubling the size of our headquarters. I remember what it took, and because of that, I know it can't stop me. Because of that, it allowed me to make more significant decisions, take bigger steps.
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David Goggins, the author of “It Can't Hurt Me,” he said in one of his social media posts, “I have to feed myself, and every foot strike that hits the pavement is how I feed myself. People look for inspiration, which is found on every footstep you take, every grasp of the iron bar, all of the miles in the pool. Inspiration is found in suffering.” We all want to be inspired, we all want to be motivated, but we don't realize we have to take the action and put ourselves in a place of suffering. After you have endured the suffering, you will realize there is an inspiration.
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Four years later, 70.3 this past weekend, yesterday. I was prepared, and I had a goal to finish this Ironman in under six hours. I got in the water, and I didn't suffer. Unlike the times before, hating the process, all I could focus on was getting through the process and discomfort. I got out with my best time and went straight to cycling. I didn't suffer through cycling. I was in the place of getting through the process, and I ended up doing it at 20 miles per hour average for 56 miles. I don't think I ever did that. I didn't suffer. I suffered the 20 weeks prior and the three months before that when I was running when I committed to running 100 miles in 8 weeks and had my best average time of 6.37. That is where I suffered. I finally got to the run.
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I didn't suffer for ten miles of that, but then I saw the finish line, and I took my focus off just getting through it and hoped it would come faster. That is where things began to slow down for me. That is when the sun started to beat down on me. It got harder to breathe, to move. I lost my focus, and the last three miles were the toughest for me. I had to remind myself to finish strong. The last half mile is when I put it back into gear. If it weren't for those two and a half miles where I was in my head, wishing it would end instead of getting through it. I prepared, I would have beat my target of six hours. I ended up missing it by 2 minutes and 40 seconds. I could have easily made that up and gotten through it. But the mind plays tricks on you. I was fine until I saw the finish line. I was fine until I said that I want to be there quicker. I want this to end. My body started to slow down and began cramping in my legs.
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This has inspired me today; I got another one in me, and I will blow my last target out of the water. I guarantee it. As David Goggins says, “As you recover, you will get inspired.” Yesterday as I was trying to recover, there was no inspiration. All I could focus on was on the pain, and today I am fully recovered, and I have new targets and new goals. This is the beginning of where I am going. Because of this, I was able to unveil the headquarters, and we are making the biggest financial investment in our lives to the next level. I voluntarily choose to suffer.
No Shame in the Suffering Game
- If you are in a place where you don't see that growth or inspiration or fire, you choose not to suffer. You will suffer the consequences of that. It's very different, the voluntary vs. the involuntary. It's all good, and you will hear it all through society, making fun of your COVID weight, like it's a joke. They will end up suffering the consequences. Just all of the 1,000’s of athletes that decided to take this on voluntarily decided to suffer when everyone else shut down. There will be a vast disparity between the lives who chose not to vs. those that did. You must decide which side you will be on. You can make light of the situation and joke about it, and it's all good until one day it isn't.
-
You can look at a person next to you who decided to do all of the right things, double down on their business, and not get shut down by the opinions of others, and market like no other; you will notice the vast disparity, feeling the shame of not keeping up and shutting down. You had every opportunity to stay up, keep up, and keep going. Will you choose the voluntary suffering, what it takes to be embarrassed, get those opinions from others, and continue to move? Or, will you subside? One way or another, you will feel the suffering.
-
There is an excellent quote by Tim Farris, “ The more voluntary suffering you build into your life, the less involuntary suffering will affect your life.” It's a decision. What will you choose? I have learned to choose the pains, undergo, and feel the distress. I've learned to endure the pain willingly. I think we all have the same story but tend to forget how great we are because voluntary suffering allows you to operate with power and authority in all aspects of your life. When you don't take charge of your suffering, it will take charge of you. It comes with an intention for voluntary suffering, and we endure it willingly, knowing there is something greater on the other side.
-
What are you afraid to suffer from? The embarrassment, shame, distress? What are you avoiding? Will that be the story of your life? I could only handle one closing or two; once I close two transactions per month, it is too much for my family and too hard on me. If that is the case, then be happy with that. Wanting anything else beyond that will be involuntary suffering. Knowing you want something more significant but unwilling to do it.
-
Romans 5:3 says, “We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame.” It gives us confidence, capacity, certainty, and will. There is no shame in that.
In Closing
- I had the honor of being on this journey with eight other agents of AZ & Associates. It was a complete honor for me. They decided to take on voluntary suffering as well. They also decided to take on 20 weeks of hard labor, shattering the stories of who they were and who they are. Realizing they have so much more within them. I'm honored to have finished this, and every one of them finished and thanked me for taking them on this journey of suffering. It was utterly amazing. I got texts that they were honored to suffer along with me. Every one of them is now stronger, more powerful, more specific in all aspects of their lives. They voluntarily chose this. You will see how this will affect every aspect of their lives. Each one of them is more certain of where their life is going, where their relationships are, how to become better fathers; every one of them has taken this energy into their business. They are on an upward slope of what it takes to win life, in the game of life.
-
To sit back today, looking back at what we embarked on, it is nothing short of great. I know they are thinking the same thing. They have more within them and more to prove. We will take on the next challenge, and all of us will come out stronger, wiser, and more powerful than before. We decided to choose our pain, to suffer, and not sit back and allow it and life to choose it for us. My question and challenge are what you can choose to bring into your life? Maybe this is the day you take a stand and declare you don't care what others have to say about my marketing. I don't care what people say about my videos. I will do this for me, and I will get better. I will communicate more powerfully because everything requires the reps, and I will look back one day and appreciate the person I am today and the courage to move forward.
-
I look at my videos from 2014, and I am stuttering the entire time. I can't even look into the camera. I appreciate that person who dared to endure the suffering and the stories he had for himself about not being a good communicator, not good on video, not good on marketing. I have shattered every one of those things. I am elite, I am the best, and I continue to remind myself of that. Whatever story you have, refuse to hang on to it; there is more within you.
-
I'm so proud of what we have accomplished, and it is the domino effect of doing the right things. I'm looking forward to the new headquarters and my next challenge. That is the key to life, to challenge ourselves, so we have something to look forward to. What is it you want for your business, family, and yourself? How do you want to feel? Set those targets, and stop living how everyone else is living, complacent. It's all good until one day it's not.
-
Set a short term goal, a short term target, and go after hard, hitting it. This is the communication of all the right things over time. I'm giving you the key and formula that has worked for me, and it works. You have to choose the pain of growth. Get through this because you are made of more. You can choose the story of this is not me, or I will make it for me. I will become that person, which means you have to suffer through the learning process, the learning curve. And you are getting it done. I'm only one week removed from turning 42, and I am elated to think about where I will be at 52. It's the beginning of the journey.
-
I feel good. I feel elated. It's incredible what your body does when you allow it to recover, less than 24 hours removed from the competition, and I am feeling 100 times better. I'm looking forward to the next challenge. I hope you all come along for the journey. Thank you again for joining me for this episode of Mindset Mastery; you know exactly what to do, and I will talk to you soon.
More Episodes
A.Z. & Associates Real Estate Group - 2019